The Boiling Crab

Rented a car while I was doing a layover in Los Angeles a few weeks back. After driving around and frequented shopping malls at Ontario Mills (http://www.simon.com/mall/default.aspx?ID=1258) and Desert Hills (http://www.premiumoutlets.com/outlets/outlet.asp?id=6), it was time to eat.

Went to a seafood restaurant named The Boiling Crab at Euclid Street in Garden Groove near LA. (http://www.theboilingcrab.com/)

First of all, the restaurant is not big. It was crowded when we arrived. We were told the waiting time about half an hour. So we took our queue number and went to a Vietnamese Café a few doors away. A unique characteristic of this Vietnamese Café is the presence of scantily clad Vietnamese waitresses around. Although there are a lot of LCD TV screens on the four walls, the eye candies are no doubt you-know-who. And one more interesting thing, no alcohol is served. Maybe they don’t have the license to do so. What goes around that looks like jugs of beer is actually Chinese tea.

First impression inside The Boiling Crab restaurant is that of a fishing village. There are fishing nets hanging on the walls and ceiling. Framed pictures of fishermen showing off their catch, fishing rods and boat anchor are part of the interior décor.

We ordered the signature Crawfish with Rajun Cajun (original) seasoning, Dungeoness Crab with Garlic Butter seasoning, King Crab legs with The whole Sha-Bang and Fried Catfish with Cajun Fries.

All our orders came in plastic bags. We were given plastic apron to wear. Tables were lined with oil absorbent papers for easy wrapping and getting rid of the shells.

The signature crawfish is not my favourite. The Cajun source was too hot. The crawfish was too small to warrant the peeling effort. The flesh did not absorb the source. It was a little bland.

Our favorite was the King Crab Legs. It was fresh and easy to handle. The Catfish came second. Nicely fried, warm and smooth on the tougue.

After eating a few dishes, all the sources tasted the same. Perhaps it was the chilly.

Try it if you have not been there.

It's the Spirit!

Human lives have four aspects: Mental, Physical, Emotional and Spiritual.

A well-rounded individual will seek to develop all four aspects of his/her live. Any aspect that is lacking will soon affect the other aspects and resulting in imbalance and unhappiness.

As I was watching the Olympic athletes dishing out their best in their respective competing fields in Beijing, I could not help but to take my hats off to them. To be able to be their countries’ flag bearers and compete in the international arena, they have put in countless years of practice and hardwork, not mentioning the obstacles and setbacks encountered along the way.

To be able to compete under pressure, the athletes need to be in their top-notch condition in all four aspects of their lives. Although the easiest to be seen is the physical aspect of the athletes – in fact, their performance is measured solely based on that – the other three aspects of lives play equally if not more significant roles in shaping their results.

China's national hero Liu Xiang was mentally, emotionally and spiritually prepared to take on the 110m hurdles event, but he failed in his physical aspect in that he suffered cramp at the beginning of the race. And so, his fellow Chinese supporters’ emotions and spirits were subsequently dented too.

During the opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics, as the athletes from around the world march into their respective rows, the TV commentator made a somewhat cruel but true statement: 90 per cent of the athletes there are going to go home without any medals, they might as well savor the glorious moments now.

If only three out of the ten contestants are going to get the top three medals, why are the rest of the athletes bother to take part? Yes, it’s the human spirit at play. Just like 95 per cent of the business start-ups fail within the first five years, why do people still trying? They don’t call it Entrepreneur Spirit for no reason.

Balance

Making things happen	Letting things happen
Doing	Being
Using my mind	Listening to my heart
Reason	Passion
Earth	Heaven

Hi, my name is Kedah!

I fly to New York Newark Airport every month. And I do not know what are the reasons that I am chosen, I will have to go through the secondary screening immigration procedure every time I step foot on the United States' soil without fail.

This secondary screening immigration procedure is called the National Security Entry-Exit Registration System, or NSEERS in short.

The following paragraph is taken off from the U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement website (http://www.ice.gov/):
“Those who fall under the second category – nonimmigrants – must also adhere to the National Security Entry-Exit Registration System (NSEERS) also known as Special Registration, put in place after September 11, 2002, to keep track of those entering and leaving our country in order to safeguard U.S. citizens and America’s borders. NSEERS was the first step taken by the Department of Justice and then by the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) in order to comply with the development of the Congressionally- mandated requirement for a comprehensive entry-exit program.”

Most of my colleagues, and I believe most of you reading this right now, do not have to go through this lengthy procedure. What you normally have to go through is like what is being practiced in many other countries: get your passport and customs form checked and chopped, finger print and picture taken and you are cleared to proceed to take your check-in luggage and clear customs.

What happened to me is that I will be identified as ‘the one’ who has to go through NSEERS when I submit my passport at the immigration counter and an immigration officer will take my passport and lead me to a smaller room located behind this row of immigration counters for further processing.

If you are a firstimer, you will probably feel nervous and impatient about the whole thing, especially after a long and tiring flight. And if you are not the first one there, or you arrive during peak hours, the room is filled with many other passengers, (or aliens, as what being referred to in the immigration form), like you. The look in their eyes focusing on you as you are walking into the room to join them will make you feel uneasy.

So on this particular day, like many other times I arrived in Newark Airport immigration, I was lead into the room for NSEERS. In my full company uniform and dragging my hand carry bag, I took a seat and made myself 'comfortable' as instructed by the officer. With my tiring eyes, I looked across the room to see who is in the same predicament as me at this time. It’s a United Nation. Their outer appearances told me that they are from Europe (most likely Eastern Europe), Russia, Korea, Indonesia, India, South America (Spanish-speaking countries) and Middle Eastern countries. Whether you are on a wheelchair or still sleeping in your cot, you are not spared. It’s a security issue here.

An Indian male passenger’s eye met mine and I smiled, he smiled back. If we could communicate via telepathy, it would probably be like this:

‘Hey, pilots also have to through this huh?’

‘Yes.’

‘What have we done to deserve all this? How long is it going to take? Am I in trouble? Will I get repatriated? How about my luggage? How about my connecting flight?’

‘Oh relax! It’s not that bad. I go through this umpteen times already. What they will do to you is, they will take off your pants, stuff their middle finger into your ass to check whether you are still virgin.’

His faced turn even more paled.

‘Ok, ok. I am just kidding. What they will do is to get some more personal data from you. They need to know where exactly you come from, your education background, your family details and your intention of coming to this ‘Land of Opportunities’. All that data will be keyed into the computer and they will pulled up the same set of data again every time you enter this country to make sure that it is you in person and not someone else. In other words, you are under closer scrutiny when you are in this country.’

‘Then why can’t they do this outside at their normal immigration counters?’

‘Because not all immigration officers are trained or authorized to conduct this procedure. And also, this is a lengthy procedure that takes time. They don’t want you to hold everyone up. And the waiting is also a way to test your patience and check your personality profile. That’s my conspiracy theory.’

‘It must be tiring for flight crew like you. You have been working for the last how many hours?’

‘Yes. My patience is running thin. Especially when you see how slow they are in their work and still find time to chat among each other. But they are kind enough to give flight crew priority. So I may get processed first before you. Please be patient.’

I winked.

An immigration officer lifted up my passport and looked at me. He shouted, ‘Kedah! Kedah!’

‘Ok, my friend, it’s my turn. Obviously he is calling me, but he is calling my home state. Should I call him California?’

I walked to this officer with a grin, wondering how he is going to react after realizing his mistake.

He looked at my passport again. Then he realized he was reading off the wrong line. And he said, ‘Oh, it’s Tan. Isn’t it? I am lucky the second time, yeah?’

I smiled back, thinking to myself. ‘Yes, you are lucky that I am in a good mood today. Don’t you owe me an apology, you idiot?’

Like many Asians who try to be nice and then lodge a complain behind your back, I said thank you when I finally got my passport back.

'Good luck! My friend from India. My crew is waiting for me outside to get to the hotel. Don’t be mad at these officials here. They are just doing their job. Cheerio!'

If you are traveling to the US, and need more information on their immigration procedure, type NSEERS under SPECKY POWER SEARCH on this blog. Good luck!

Cabin Crew Stories

The article titled ‘Planes, Slaps and Sex’ published on Asiaone digital news (http://digital.asiaone.com/Digital/Features/Story/A1Story20080527-67217.html) has garnered attention of the public on the ‘glamorous, scandalous and the ugly of life’ as a flight crew. Among others, the article mentioned how easy it is for flight crew to get involved in affairs and sleep with each other.

Like most of the curious readers, my wife and I were amused by the stories written by ‘ex-stewardess/steward’ bloggers like Beh and Boh Tong. So much so that my wife asked me whether those stories are true.

Yes, those stories might be true dear. But that doesn’t mean every flight crew is doing it. These crews represent only a small percentage of the whole profession, just like in any other industry. If one has the desire to have an affair, it can happen anywhere. It does not need to be in an overseas hotel room or in that particular uniform.

As human beings, we are often tempted to taste the forbidden fruit. But as responsible human beings, we ought to think of the consequences of our actions. Affairs are usually results of broken relationships at home. Instead of focusing on the fear of whether our spouse is going to sleep with other people, we should really focus on how we can strengthen our relationships in our marriage. We should constantly find ways to keep that ‘old flame’ going.

To me, rumors, affairs and scandals often make good stories. It is not surprising how much details bloggers are willing to reveal to capture readers’ attention these days. Although these stories make interesting read, I won’t spend too much time reading them, as there is not much substance that I can take home with that might contribute to my total wellbeing.

Pursuit of Happiness

I was watching ‘Your Baby Can Read’ video CD with my son and one of the segments featured a poem that goes something like this:

Babies like to learn new things
Because of the joy that learning brings

My son Caden has been growing steadily for the past few months. Not a single day passes by when he does not learn how to say a new word or communicate through the look of his eyes and his action, a greater understanding of how things are. And the realization that he has learnt new things brings us much joy.

How I wish I had watched that VCD when I was young. In retrospect, I did not realize that learning is the key to happiness until a few years ago. Prior to that, I went through schooling up till university level with the thought that the knowledge gain was to help me in securing a job in the society, not so much of the joy it could bring.

Not until I read the books ‘The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari’ by Robin Sharma and ‘Awaken The Giants Within’ by Anthony Robbins that I start to realize learning is truly the key to happiness. In ‘Awaken The Giant Within’, Anthony explains how our brain and neuron system works at our subconscious level. Every time we learn something through seeing, listening, smelling, tasting and touching, formation of linkage or linkages between or amongst neurons occurs. This process brings about some electro-chemical activities that make us feel happy. So in order to feel happy, we should always bring about these neuro-chemical activities. That is why Anthony advocates his trademark term CANI! – Constant And Never-ending Improvement, similar to the Japanese concept of Kaizen mentioned in “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari’.

The Chinese has a similar conventional wisdom that translates literally to ‘Live till Death, Learn till Death’ (活到老，学到老). It highlights the importance of keep on learning and upgrading oneself not just to remain relevant to the society, but also to achieve greater joy of living.

When we help someone learns, the joy becomes double, because joyful emotions are infectious. When we help someone learns, our neoro-linkages get reinforced, hence also brings about the neuro-chemical activities that will make us happy.

I get so excited when Caden managed to show me where his ears and eyes are when I ask him about them. Every time he stands up automatically and dances to the tune of the action song:

Heads and shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes,

Heads and shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes,

Eyes and ears and mouth and nose

Heads and shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes.

I could not help it but to also sing and action together with him. Although the song is still a little too fast for him to follow, but he will still stand up and goes for his toes straight away.

As adults, have we stopped learning? When was the last time we read a self-help book, attend a seminar, or attend a discussion group? When was the last time we opened our mind and be willing to admit that we did not know something and it is time for us to go and find out? Are we unhappy because we think that we have already known all, and life has become stagnant and dull? It is time to bring about that neuro-chemical activity.

Letting Go

Caden had a balloon dog. He walked the dog frequently for a few days. But every morning when he woke up and took a look at the dog, it got skinnier and skinnier. And finally one day, it got so sick that it could not walked anymore.

He took the balloon dog and walked to me with his curious eyes: Why wouldn’t doggy walk anymore?

As a first-time father, I was thinking hard on how to explain the fleeting nature of things to my one-and-a-half-year-old son. That the only constant in life is change, that all beings are impermanent and changing forms frequently.

I have been turning into a metrosexual lately. Thanks partly to my wife who is operating a spa specializing in massages and facials. www.scentdiscovery.com. I have been influenced by her on the importance of living healthily and looking good to boost one’s self-confidence. I have been putting on moisturizer and anti-aging cream on my face and skin, especially more so when I see wrinkles at the corner of my eyes in the mirror.

I flipped through the papers and I saw so many advertisements on beauty and slimming treatment. People are told to cling on to their bodies, to take measures to resist aging. But don’t we know that our bodies are aging and dying every minute? Although our cells are constantly being regenerated and replenished that we have a ‘whole new’ body every ten days, the regeneration process is going to slow down eventually and we are going to age and finally die.

So why are we still fervently trying something that is futile? That no matter how hard we try, we are still going to get old and die anyway?

Why do we have to work so hard everyday to make money to buy bigger house and cars and at the end of the day, we can’t take those things with us when we leave this world? Why do we have to get agitated when someone cuts into our lane while we are driving, when we won’t even remember each other moments after we drive in different directions?

Why do I have to try so hard to succeed when probably no one would remember me a hundred years from now?

Because not trying is suicidal. Not clinging on at all is not living. Not pursuing something right from the beginning knowing that that something is not going to last is not living life to the fullest.

Yes, I want to be healthy. I want to look good and confident, even though my body is going to age and die eventually. I cannot relent on my efforts to strive hard in everything I do. Doing otherwise is denying myself a chance to live at the highest level.

But when it is time to let go, let go. The key word is when. I believe we do not have to worry about when. We will know it one way or the other. Just like when Caden discovered his balloon dog could not walk anymore.

Is it Luck or Effort?

Pen Cai - a pot of delicacies comprising abalone, scallops, prawns, mushrooms, pork trotter, etc.. A symbol of wealth and presperity in Chinese culture.

Chinese New Year celebration is the time when we meet up with relatives and friends, some of whom we have not met for a long time. Apart from exchanging mandarin oranges, giving red packets to children and munching New Year cookies, we catch up on each other’s progress in life.

Some have not changed a single bit. Some remain status quo. Some might not have done so well, but due to festive moods, nobody can tell from their outer appearance. According to Chinese customs, we only want to say and hear ‘the good things’ during the celebration anyway.

I had a chance to visit a very big bungalow house belongs to a distant relative when I was in Melaka for Chinese New Year celebration two weeks ago. He bought the piece of land that the house sits on during the financial crisis around 1997 and only started and finished constructing his bungalow recently. The double-storey bungalow has six bedrooms. Each of his children has a specially designed bedroom of their own completed with pinkish colour theme for his daughters and non-pinkish theme for his sons.

The bungalow comes with a garden punctuated with a hut for alfresco dining, a Japanese carp pond, a huge living room with the latest home entertainment system, a big study room, dry and wet kitchen, all come with the best flooring materials available in the market. What impressed me most are the thoughts that have gone into each design. The location of each room and the facing of the house are built based on Feng Shui theory. The material and color of the flooring and the spiral staircase are chosen based on aesthetics and weather endurance. Up high hanging from the ceiling in front of the spiral staircase is a stunning chandelier equipped with motorized chain to facilitate the lowering of the chandelier for ease of maintenance.

Chinese often wish each other good luck, prosperity and wealth during the Chinese New Year celebration. My distant relative is definitely one of those who have acquired lots of wealth and prosperity in the past years. I could sense it through his explanation as he walked me around his bungalow.

And he is not the only one. A lot of my friends have gotten promotion, moved to bigger houses and driven larger cars. As a result of good food and good life, some have gotten rounder around their waist and lower chin too. As we seldom see each other on a daily basis, it is not appropriate for us to ask during the gathering on how such wealth is accumulated or how they become successful. This only leads to speculation behind their back. One prominent factor that often pops up is ‘they got lucky’. ‘He got lucky working for a nice boss.’ ‘He got lucky marrying a daughter of a wealthy shipping tycoon.’ ‘He got lucky that he bought that property during the economy downturn.’

It makes me wonder how big is a role luck plays in determining our success? If we did not put in efforts in upgrading our skills, increasing our market value or sharpening our sensitivity for economic cycles, could we still succeed when good luck fell upon us? If the reasons for success can be broken down in terms of percentage, how many percent should it be attributed to good luck?

A person who strikes lottery and wins a million dollars is often said to be lucky. But if this person did not put in effort in buying a lottery ticket, would he still succeed in winning the prize?

I believe 85% of our success comes from our efforts, 10% talent, something that comes with us when we are born, and only 5% luck.

Perhaps the next time I meet a successful person, I should get to know him/her better and emulate the efforts that have been put in in achieving success. This is much more empowering than just brushing off a person’s efforts and say that this person got lucky.

However, when we are asked how we got successful, we must always say that we got lucky. This is to show that we are humble, although huge chunk of our success is due to our own efforts. Just like when my sis-in-law said that we got lucky in being able to choose a capable domestic helper in taking care of our son, I could only agree with her, although my wife and I did put in some efforts in choosing which maid agency can best do its job and also in training the helper to help us in the way we want it to be.

Road to Taj Mahal II - Horn Please

Every country has its unique culture and interesting phenomena. I thought a drive through Serangoon Road in Singapore’s ‘Little India’ during the weekend was sufficient to give me a taste of the traffic situations in India, till I arrived at Delhi.Delhi International Airport’s terminal was undergoing upgrading works. It was dusty and cramp. Loose wires and air-con structures were clearly visible overhead. Ceiling over the luggage collection belt area was so low that I could touch it with the top of my head by tip-toeing. The wait for our luggage definitely took longer than that in Changi Airport. That was when I realized I had arrived at a third world country.

The road leaving the airport was undergoing upgrading works too. I was overwhelmed by a sense of deja-vu as I barely remembered I had been there during one of my working trips about three years ago. The roads were under upgrading works then. They still are.

Then came the irritating sounds of vehicle horn, all too frequent that they were hardly effective. Road users including pedestrians there had developed deaf ears on the horning sounds as they tried death-defying stunts in getting ahead.

I was amazed at how many different kinds of vehicle allowed on public roads there. Besides bicycles, cars and lorries, they have two-wheel motorbikes, three-wheel motorbikes, bull-carts, camel-carts and even farming tractors on roads between Delhi, Agra and Jaipur.

My wife and I felt that we were very lucky to have a safe driver assigned to us throughout our tour. Shalinder is our driver’s name. He is an Indian Muslim. He did not drive recklessly. But he still horned too often that we expected him to. He would pressed on the car horn continuously when he saw a motorbike, or whatever vehicle that may be, in front on our lane far ahead. And as usual, the motorbike showed no sign of giving way as if the horning was some sort of singing in the wind.

As I tried to analyze why do Indian drivers horn so often, I came across some colorful messages printed on the back of some lorries, ‘Horn Please – Use Dipper at Night’. Apparently, the lorry drivers could not see what was coming from behind. Vehicles from behind were encouraged to signal either by horning or using high beam at night (to minimize noise?). And why was it that they could not see what was coming from behind? Because either the side mirrors were flushed with the vehicles' body and thus not usable or the side mirrors were not installed at all! The same situation occurred to cars and motorbikes. It was just that there was no space on other vehicles for such colorful messages.

And why didn’t they install side mirror, which is an important safety feature? To reduce aerodynamic drag and save fuel, I guessed.

Road to Taj Mahal I - Emblem of Love

Visiting Taj Mahal has been on our to-do list for a long time. Taj Mahal, being one of the Seven Wonders of the World remains a sparkling tourist attraction to us especially my wife, whose life’s goals include visiting all of the Seven Wonders of the World.

And so we did two weeks ago, when the timing and conditions were right. More significantly, having a picture of the two of us taken with Taj Mahal in the background signifies a milestone in our marriage. We have been married for six years. Our son is now seventeen months old. Taj Mahal as an emblem of long lasting love is witness to our strengthening relationship and our commitment to propel our marriage to greater levels.

Indian Emperor Shah Jahan built Taj Mahal as a memorial for his second wife, Mumtaz Mahal, who died giving birth to their fourteenth child in 1631. The Emperor loved his wife so much that her death is said to have caused his hair to turn white overnight. It took 22 years to build and in total, it took 20,000 people from India and as far afield as Europe to produce the exquisite marble screens and marble inlay work made with thousands of semiprecious stones.

Poets have described its beauty using phrases like ‘a teardrop on the face of eternity’ and ‘the embodiment of all things pure’।